what a year.

I CANNOT believe I made it.  The end of a whole year and I am still standing--a feat I wasn't so sure I'd achieve a few months ago.  I ended my year with my last retrospective essay, tying both semesters and everything I had learnt so far.  It was a difficult yet satisfying endeavour that, in short, made me feel so blessed to no end with everything in my life and where I am at present. Thank you, God.

May 8, 2014

I began my journey at Hampshire with an extremely broad interest: people. The classes that I took throughout the two semesters brought out many ways of looking at people that I had not seen or did not expect to see.

Adolescent Development was a good tutorial class that introduced me to academic life in college as well as a taste of what psychology was. I found ideas surrounding identity development and psychopathology to pique my interest.  I hope to delve back into psychology (perhaps dabbling in developmental or cognitive psychology) to gage how I would find them at present.

How People Learn has had a huge impact on my direction of study. Coming from an exam-oriented education system and being introduced to many new educational theories of cognition and instruction, I found myself drawing connections to life experiences and being emotionally-invested in the class readings, discussions, and reaction papers. At first, I was frustrated at why many of these ideas seemed nonexistent outside of Hampshire. Diving deeper into the topic, I started to gain better insight at how many educators have already been working hard on bringing these theories into the classroom. The climb was steeper than I thought, especially when financial, socioeconomic, racial, and political setbacks entered the picture. Being part of Hampshire's unique educational pedagogy increased my preexisting drive and curiosity to dive deeper into what goes into the design of learning environments—socially, emotionally, culturally, and academically. This changed my entire perspective on what I thought education was. A lot of these new ideas of metacognition, improved ways of assessment, social and emotional learning, different learning styles, and transfer have not seen the light of day in many schools. 

The more I read about the endless education inequity in my Getting to College class, the more I found myself willing to contribute ideas to classroom discussions—a step forward from my first semester. There are so many aspects surrounding this field that I wish to explore and bring to the community; theories that can be strongly utilised to improve education equity. I am considering diving deeper into the ideas of inclusion in schools, the dynamics of race in a classroom (multicultural education), and maybe even special education. Communication disorders have been something that has struck my interest since the fall but I have yet to take a class that explores this complex issue, culturally and scientifically, to better gage where I stand in this. Organising my first workshop for A Day at Hampshire College as part of my class has reminded me of my love for kids and the surprising ways they inspire me. It has made me seriously consider dealing with more youth-related work to see how far I can take this. I have also been thinking about the connections I have and can make with the youth in Malaysia. However, with a context rather different from the U.S., I do worry that it would be hard to find classes that can help me understand the context of the children in my home country better. Nonetheless, at the moment, I think it is best to learn as much as I can about the broad concepts and ideas surrounding education equity, racial and socioeconomic implications as well as what we can do to put theory into practice.

While I've had many discoveries in relation to the community, the personal growth that I have gained from the arts has been equally rewarding if not more. The journeys in my Dancing Modern and Introduction to Painting classes have oddly shared many of the same trajectories. I came into the classes with rather low self-esteem in my capabilities as an artist (in more than one sense of the word), thinking my abilities would not match up with the level of expertise of a college-level class. I guess part of the problem is that I came into the class with a fixed idea of what art was and how it should be executed. I was wrong. For dance, I came in with the impression that dance was heavily aesthetic and technical given my background in Ballet and Rhythmic Gymnastics. I walked away with a deeper understanding that dance (or art) was not something you could fit into one box. My favourite discovery was that meaningful dances were the ones that could tell authentic stories—those that came from a genuine place and went beyond technical and aesthetic value. Daphne introduced me to a whole new world of dancing from a very raw and genuine place: the heart. I learnt a lot about how different dance styles can represent a culture—every movement and gesture can be a story that defines a community or the way of life of an entire generation at the time. 

For art, I came into class wanting to paint realistically thinking that it was the only “good” way of painting. I credit my art professor, Andrea for successfully changing my mindset entirely on what a good painting is. She relentlessly did everything in her power to get me to paint over pieces, challenge the use of colours I used, and stop caring too much about how mainstream ideals of beauty may influence my work. I remember instinctually painting a human body with three different colours in frustrated response to her repeated comments on how I wasn't taking enough risks. I recall her looking at it for a while and then saying to me, “Andrea, you have such great eye for colour. But sometimes, how come you don't show it?” I started the class trying to fit into the only mold I thought existed and walked out of it realising that I had the freedom to create my own mold or try on different ones. It has drawn me to explore my identity and establish my own unique voice in art and dance—looking into future classes in choreography and abstract painting. If I were to think of it within the context of psychology and education, I think I have discovered art and dance to be tools I could use in order to listen, hear, communicate, express, and understand the stories and emotions of people. Arts integration, art therapy, and dance therapy have all been areas I am interested in learning more about.

one of the most satisfying pieces (to me), so far.

My skills in signing and communicating using American Sign Language (ASL) has improved throughout the year. The interactions I have had with the Deaf communities in various settings have been humbling and they have been very patient with my slow signing pace. As we endeavour to petition for an ASL 3 class, I look forward to be able to take this class when Hampshire offers it. But more importantly, learning about Deaf culture has made me more culturally sensitive and empathic towards people from very diverse backgrounds. These simple but very human lessons extend to my Emergency Medical Technician (EMT) class in which my instructor and TAs, who range from firefighters to paramedics, inspire me every week. I have learnt a lot not only as a student, but a person having to deal with people in a wide range of scenarios. The sincerity I have found in the people who do this work have inspired me to apply what I have learnt as a future EMT, as nerve-wrecking as that thought can be.

My Campus-Engaged Learning (CEL-1) activities in wellness have taught me the importance of a supportive community which I hope to share as an International Student Orientation Leader during the fall. My participation in the Winter Dance Concert as well as a dancer in the Bare Bones Dance Concert at Smith College has reminded me why I love performing arts in the first place—the adrenaline rush before and during the performance, the rapport you forge with the entire team of dancers and crew, as well as the little moments in preparation for the show where you see such dedication and commitment that inspire you to be better at what you love to do.

Us, in our unattractive shorts but it's okay coz the dance was worth it.

In short, I began my journey at Hampshire with a keen interest in people and I ended my first year at Hampshire with a whole flurry of colours presented to me within the study of people. In my first semester, I grew invested in the power of the arts as a means of communication and expression of emotions, stories, identities, and even cultures. In my second semester, I uncovered another gem: education and found countless connections with the arts and psychology. I became the most emotionally-driven and invested I have ever been in causes of education inequity and oppression of people who may differ from the majority in any way. Both semesters have presented me with the multi-faceted aspect of what it is to be human through the arts, dance, psychology, education, language, and medicine. Moving forward, I hope to dive deeper into education and psychology, perhaps with a focus on human development. I hope to continue improving my skills in the arts, dance, and languages in order to reach out to people of as many diverse backgrounds as possible.

Excited for the journey ahead,